B*tch Better Have My Mummy
Every so often, things you find on the Internet work out. Not very often, but occasionally.
Having had my fair share of Pinterest fails, (looking at you, vomitous avocado mac and cheese. You too, red white and blue strawberries.) I was nervous-excited to try out this mummy calzone that I found on the blog Lollipopsicle.
It seemed easy enough -- pre-made pizza dough, delicious filling, bake 20 minutes and enjoy, but how many times have we all discovered that the shortcuts very rarely work?
Well, this time it did. All my doubts were assuaged. I made this with one of my best friends and we ate 99% of this in one sitting, it was that good.
Aside from being almost nauseatingly cute, this recipe is also super customizeable. Throw in whatever you normally like in a calzone or on your pizza, just leave the tomato sauce out of it.
We used some Trader Joe's basic marinara as a dipping sauce and it worked perfectly.
As one commenter on my Instagram of the finished mummy calzone put it, "this is a great excuse to throw a Halloween party." I fully agree, but I would also make this any night of the week. Past Halloween, just cut the pizza dough into two rectangles and make slightly smaller calzones. I know I'll be doing that sometime soon for sure.
Ingredients:
1 package pizza dough (we used the Trader Joe's garlic and herb dough)
1 c. frozen broccoli florets, defrosted
1/2 onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 or 2 spicy chicken sausages, roughly chopped into small pieces (reserve 1 half-moon shaped slice for mouth)
1 to 1 1/2 c. shredded mozzarella
1 olive cut in half for eyes or 2 jalapeño slices or what have you
Your choice of tomato sauce for dipping
EVOO
Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 400F. Roll out the dough into a large rectangle (ours was about the size of a legal pad). You might need to flour the dougha little so it doesn't stick. Place on a greased baking sheet.
2. Sautee the onion and garlic until almost translucent. Add the broccoli and sausage, cook 2 minutes more.
3. Carefully cut the pizza rectangle to create the mummy bindings. Cut about 10 strips into each side of the dough, about 2 inches long, leaving a triangle at the top (you'll fold this down to make the head). Here's a link to a picture of what it should look like from the Lollipopsicle site since we didn't have the foresight to take one of our own.
4. Arrange the broccoli mixture in the center of the dough and cover with cheese. Carefully fold the dough strips over one another, starting at the bottom. Finally, fold the triangle of dough in the center down. Arrange the jalapeño or olive slices and the sausage to create eyes and a mouth.
5. Bake for about 25 minutes or until dough is golden brown and puffy. Serve with tomato sauce. Demolish.
